WHO IS SHE?

Optimistic, reserved, beautiful, clever, energetic, well behaved, elegant, and hard-working are qualities embedded in her. While battling with the day to day struggles, love found her or probably she fell in love.

He was a stranger,came in as a friend, calls to check up on me, cruise town with me, showed kind gestures, took care of needs that choked me, always around to comfort me during my trying times, gave me a shoulder to lean on whenever i needed one, changed my entire world and i was genuinely happy. Always looking forward to another moment with him, i felt safe with him and he made me believe love was all i needed, he pampered me, my life was full of fantasy and i enjoyed every minute. I poured out my whole self to him, i found love indeed!

Here comes the day i had long awaited, the day i have always dreamt of, on this day he welcomed me legally into his life and home. Late in the night after the whole partying and celebration, the newly wedded couple on the soft bouncing bed, he stared uncontrollably at me, grazed in between my hair over a million times, kissed me affectionately, there was a spark of love in the air, behold i fell into a deep sleep in his arms. WOW, A NEW WORLD IT IS!!

Several months later, i felt totally different, weak, and pale. Am i expecting a baby? Oh yes it true! The doctor confirmed it, it was indeed a great news to hear. Sure we were excited and looked forward to welcome the new member of the family.

Out of the blue, everything changed, i never saw this coming. I was no longer perfect for him, no longer beautiful to him, he emphasized daily that I was full of flaws and lazy, nothing i do seems good, too outspoken for him, not worthy to be called his own wife, What! At this time?

I found it hard to cope with the new change, not at this time i thought, this was the love of my life, my whole world, this was one part of my life i couldn’t get rid of, someone i can’t imagine my tomorrow without. Just a little mistake emerged into an unsolvable issue, boom! I was out of the house. Now it dawned on me that i am all alone, i felt betrayed, abandoned, neglected and at the same time frustrated. Was this what years and months of loyalty resulted to? Was this what i deserved? It completely shattered and changed me not leaving behind my thinking. Memories hunted me every night and day giving me sleepless nights, brought down my health condition.

I was in severe pain, my inside was tearing apart, almost every vein in my body was visible, yet no stream of tears, my eyes were completely red and i could feel my head spinning. The day my baby would arrive is here. The love of my life, father of my unborn child was nowhere to be found, i needed him the most at this time. Wow love hurts you the most when you least expect it. Yeah it does, unexpected things tend to shatter you the more even if might later make you stronger.

His duplicate was right beside me, and he wasn’t here to see how beautiful and charming his little lookalike was. I started to imagine how drastically my life would change, i wasn’t alone anymore, I have a liability now, I have to be a mother, at the same time a father, a cook, cleaner, counselor, singer, teacher, motivational speaker and a doctor to my child.

The journey became more tougher than i expected, sleepless nights filled with thoughts, I totally forgot how to love the way i was taught. No need to be reminded because all i love now is the image of myself embedded in another creature. He never came back, he had abandoned and forgotten me and his child, we went back to being strangers. But what went wrong? What happened to that love that once blossomed? What happened to those promises of I would spend eternity with you? What happened to the talks of we would raise our kid together, teach him how to love and be good to others? Damn! The kid is right here and he isn’t. What exactly changed? No answers. Probably it was a bed of lies i lied on.

WHO IS SHE?

12 thoughts on “WHO IS SHE?

  1. Life Sha. Nice write up dear, it really hit me. A big shout out to all mothers who have endured and went through a lot while playing double role within the family🙌🙌🙌

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I get my own part.. sis keep it up.. A mother can’t single only cos of many reasons that is now clear to another..

    May almighty Allah increase ur knowledge and understanding..

    Smile

    Liked by 1 person

  3. More knowledge sis,its always hard to answer those thoughts of love at first site, moving from your mind to your heart and vitually all ur vein n arteries and end up becoming a stranger to someone whom had ones being the reason for your smile and happiness with an unknown cause of not feeling any fantasy with ur lovers anymore…
    It only takes courage and love to overcome those trial times.
    But note its vice versa not just single mum, there are lot of single Dad out there…

    Liked by 1 person

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